A Woman in Law School

13: started smoking in my backyard. YUCK! Continued off and on for many moons. Officially stopped around age 26 (?). At thirteen I was a frizzy haired ugly child who wore mens suits to school.

14: had an encounter with Kurt Cobain at a party. I was on something, he was on something. Enough said.

15: After five years of living with mom I realized that I needed more discipline. So I made arrangements to live with my dad. At 15 I made the best decision of my life. Had I not chosen to move I'm pretty sure I would have continued down the road exemplified above. Looking back on that decision I have to say that I'm really proud of myself for recognizing that I NEEDED something different and that I was the perfect person to instill that change in direction.

That is how I've felt toward blogging lately. I'll try to snap out of it, but no promises. So my semester started last week and I've been going nonstop ever since. For some reason my school always schedules "mandatory" meetings all at once and it drives me bezerk!

In addition, my classmates have been eager to discuss grades and figure out where everyone lies on the class curve. While I haven't used my line I have politely refrained from discussing my grades. In addition to grades, it has been interesting to observe who is no longer talking to some and who is now sitting next to others. I fall into the former category as I have chosen to distance myself from someone who I was "close" to last semester and it has been awkward. She's a lovely person but I realized that she does nothing for me. Nothing as in not helping me understand concepts, responding to my questions, helping me fill in my notes, etc. I'm sure that may sound selfish but why should I continue to work on a friendship that does nothing for me? I still sit near her, just not next to her. Again, things are awkward so far...and I'm tired...eh, does it get any better?

We moved to a much larger city where my mom became the stereotypical single mom and worked her butt off to keep us afloat. We lived in a little cul-de-sac with plenty of kids to play with. I remember being excited and scared about the move and the divorce. I remember being in the second grade when my mom first told me she was planning on leaving my dad. It took her two years to do it. For those two years I had a huge box right next to my door that I kept all the things I wanted to take with me. It was safe to do so as my dad never traveled up the stairs that far. I vididly remember the day we left my dad. I was at a pool party, a birthday pool party in June. School was over and it was starting to get hot. My mom came to pick me up and we left from there. She only packed the trunk so my dad wouldn't catch on to anything and she never looked back. For three and a half hours we listed to The Supremes Greatest Hits and I cried.

It was the best thing my mother ever did for herself. And I'm glad she did it.

When I was 7, 8, 9, and 10 I really don't remember much. I think it's because my parents divorced when I was 10 and for some strange reason I forgot a lot of what went on when they were married.

I grew up without tv so I read about every book in the library that I could. My favorite books during this age span were the Anne of Green Gables series. Imust have read those books several times. Life on a farm meant you had to use your imagination or get lost in a good book. When I wasn't reading my brother and I would try to lose my sister in the orchards. We also pretended we were squirrels a lot in our treehouse. Sometimes I would visit a friend down the road who lived on a dairy farm. We would climb the stacks of hay and stare at the clouds.

My mom told me that I made it to a spelling bee final when I was in the fourth grade. I lost on the word encyclopedia. Fourth grade was the last grade at my little school before I moved with my mom, brother and sister to a much bigger city. I was a little upset about this because in fifth grade they showed all the girls the menstration video (on old school reels) and I never got to see it. Oh well!

All but one of my grades has been posted. The grade that hasn't been posted is the one I'm most curious about because I thought it was my best exam. Grades are interesting. I kinda know where I sit amongst my classmates now and it bothers me. When I was a graduate student all I had to do was maintain a 3.00 GPA which was simple, even when you're taking all math courses and grades weren't really taken into consideration by employers either. Now, I'm "competing" with 60 others and I'm starting to feel like maybe I don't know how to do this well enough. Don't get me wrong, I am content with my grades. There is always room for improvement...yada, yada, yada. BUT this is where the what ifs start appearing. What if I study more! What if I did more practice exams! And the thing is I may just always be in the spot I'm at, regardless of what I try. I just have to be appreciative that I'm not the last in my class.

What bums me out is that there are law students in my class that will be eager to discuss grades on facebook and in class when we start next week and I can honestly say that I don't want to know how others did.

So, if you are talking about grades around me beware! My formula response will be, "Do you want to share your sex life too? Because that's pretty personal."

I just have to remember that grades can't necessarily network for you. And if there is one thing I can do it's network and talk to strangers. Sometimes a pleasant personality can open a lot of doors for you. At least let's hope it does.

In my opinion, the women ABC finds for The Bachelor are absolutely effing crazy, which is why I love to watch the show. Apparently women all over North America are crazy for single-dad Jason from Seattle. I said apparently, although I think freaky stalkerish sounds better.

I always learn interesting things about women watching this show. For instance, who knew that as I approach 30 my eggs are rotting! Or that I can still be a pagent queen at 29! I also did not realize that deceased husbands send their wives and mothers of their children happiness by encouraging them to go on The Bachelor. Who knew!

Ladies, ladies, ladies don't...:

• wear an orange dress because Jason's son's favorite color is orange, and especially don't tell Jason that's why you're wearing the dress!
• tell Jason you're so excited to meet him after watching him on last season's The Bachelorette, it just sounds crazy stalkerish.
• ask about hot dog toppings...although this would probably work on me.
• wear Bubba teeth.
• giggle like a Playboy bunny on a trampoline.
• and pagents are not the new pink.

This is the kind of crap I live for!

Edits: Apparently "girls have a woman's intuition." Wow! I had no clue. The vision board thing is probably something I would do on a rainy day, maybe something to do with mom, but I wouldn't use it to pick up men. I also would keep my boobs IN my dress, not lowly hanging out of my dress.

I think I got chicken pox when I was five. This should not be confused with the multiple times I was sent home from school thinking I had chicken pox when in reality it was just a million mosquito bites.

At six my parents started sending me to church camp for a week in the summer. I loved camp so much I was a counselor until I was 22. As campers we got away with doing so much crap and as counselors we got away with more. But when I was six I fell into the creek on my first day of camp, got a goose egg sized bump and was known as "Goose Bump." I don't think my parents realize it but sending me off to camp every summer helped mold me into the independent traveler I am.

I should mention that for the first ten years of my life I have to resort to mom as I don't remember much before my parents divorce. So we're kinda stuck with mom's memories.

When I was four my sister was born. We went to Disneyland via camper. Supposedly this is on videotape somewhere but I've never seen it. The only thing I remember about Disneyland is that I wanted one of those Mickey Mouse shaped ballons but I couldn't have one because my mom is allergic to helium when it's close by. I also remember going on the Queen Mary (?) boat which is haunted and remember seeing ghosts.

My 30th birthday is this month! Hooray! Now I can pretend to practice my cougaring skillz! In honor of this momentous birthday (ugh) I thought I would blog about an event that took place for each year of my life during January.

One: I was born. I like to joke that I was adopted since I don't look like my parents however they have told me that I was the only white girl born that day, probably that week in such a small town. Being the redneck my father is, he insisted on holding me in his arms while driving the severe icy roads home. I guess you could say he inspired Britney's driving skills.

Two: My brother was born. My family sold two cows to pay for my brother's hospital bills. That's how we rolled, in cattle. I later learned that my dad named the cows after family members he didn't like and can remember their names to this day.

Three: I sucked my fingers and carried a blanket around. My parents were eager to get me to quit so they used pickle juice and mustard on my hands. This started my hatred for all things pickled and mustardy, as any close friend knows.

Like most people I made New Years resolutions that I, again like most people, will forget about in approximately three weeks.

• Use time more wisely.
• Tone my midsection through actual exercise (Gasp!)
• Visit a place I've never been to before.
• Read 30 books not related to classes.
• Exercise my patience for others and their opinions.
• Cut down on spending and learn to dress more frugal.
• Get out and meet more people!
• Learn to be civil toward J's relatives.
• Be a better friend.
• Keep a cleaner house.
• See my nephew at least once.
• Have a lot of fun and try to surround myself with laughter as much as possible.

Now, these are pretty reasonable. So J thought I should add some predicitions in there. As I am not qualified to make predictions regarding the economy, Nobel Prize winners, or elections I think I'll stick to small stuff.

I predict:

• at least one man will offer me beer on my morning bus ride;
• my brother will be incarcerated for the entire year;
• the Carolina Panthers will be in the Super Bowl;
• the Mets will make the playoffs;
• we will still have economic woes come July;
• I will procrastinate on my outlines again;
• that Heath Ledger will not win any posthumous awards for The Dark Knight;
• and that Jennifer Aniston will not be married or pregnant;
• but Nicole Kidman will be working on baby 2 along with Christina Aguilera and Katie Holmes.
• and that Justice Stevens will resign late in the year.

Do you agree? Disagree? Care?

I have several resolutions for 2009 which I'll discuss later, however one of them is to read for pleasure more than I have. I used to love doing Booking Through Thursday on an older blog. I looked forward to the questions and I learned a lot about books. So, I thought I would try it here.