I came across this piece over at Feministing, one of my favorite feminist blogs. Neko Case was recommended to me by a former roommate, but I never listened to her because, well, I rarely took advice or suggestions from this roommate because I just didn't. We had one of those friendships where you just keep saying "yeah, uh huh." in any and all conversations.
Then I woke up to Neko's voice on NPR one morning and fell instantly in love with her haunting voice. The fact that she grew up not too far from me excited me as well.
While the context in which I apply her words are different than the blog piece, I can't help but relate to the phrase "Don't let them tell you you're nothing." I'm finding that I'm reminding myself that I worked hard to get into law school, that it's a privilege just to be where I'm at. I'm reminding myself of the light at the end of the tunnel; the work that I desire to do; the bleeding heart liberal change I wish to inspire; yada, yada, yada. I'm working my ass off; I lack sleep, nutrition, and common sense and I'm struggling with my classmate's small comments which try to keep me believing that I'm nothing. "Nothing" as in my hard work is not going to pay off. It's to the point where I'm thinking of switching seats in my classes. I don't want to take this step mainly because I'm trying equally hard to balance being social with being studious. I also believe that I can work through the comments and the challenge of staying focused in class. The hard part is that these are supposed to be my friends. I suppose this is where the "oh so wise" 2Ls and 3Ls will laugh at me and tell me that there is no such thing as "friends" in law school but I'll refuse to listen. I think friendship is possible, it just might take awhile for me to find it. But right now I'm focusing on telling myself that I AM EVERYTHING! And the briefing, prepping for class, outlining and time I'm putting in will pay off. It will. And they will eventually learn that there are no casenotes for life after law school.*
And now for one of my favorite Neko Case songs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50dzxkJa1NE
(And yes, that is her LIVE. That voice is mesmerizing!)
* Casenotes are briefs you can purchase for your text book. Many law students choose to read these in lieu of their actual textbooks.
Labels: 1L, law schools, my school
But I still let it get to me sometimes :) And as for friends, I think they're possible. But hardly anyone (at least at my ls) is like they seem, sometimes for the better and sometimes not. This was a big change for me. But 7 months later, I'm finally making what I hope will be very good friends.
Keep on!
A
Oh, and I really like the new blog design! Normally I read in googlereader, but I clicked through today - very cool!